When passion leads to killing
- By Obakeng Seabelo from Botswana
- 15 juin 2015
- 3 min de lecture
Passion killings are at rage these days in Botswana. Time flies and we keep hearing stories of passion killings; innocent women, youth and children lose their lives every day and even male counterparts are victims. These issues are being raised on radio, television, newspapers and magazines, also through demonstrations by humble citizens demanding the perpetrators to stop this brutal practice. Yet, nothing seems to change…
The pressure lies on governments but also on every one of us to take actions and change things, to fight such traumatizing incidents. I’ve heard stories about people being killed for ritual purposes, of parental violence towards their own children and so on. This brings sorrow to entire families, leaves children orphans. When I heard about passion killings I asked myself “what does this mean? Who is behind all of this? What steps should be taken to stop it? I am still unable to conceive how a human being can engage herself/himself in this kind of evil activity.
So what is passion killing exactly? It is described as a murder due to the result of sudden anger or heartbreak, which means the person responsible for this could have acted differently if they were not angry or heartbroken.
Botswana is one of the countries in Africa rated with the highest numbers of passion killings. My country of peace and harmony has this big dark stain on it. And I just wonder; why?
Number of reasons has been advanced to explain the high incidence of passion killings across Botswana, including unequal power dynamics in relationships between men and women; increasing poverty levels and youth unemployment, which have also been cited as contributing factors of the prostitution increase and the violent environment inherent to it.
Let’s try to think this through. Men are cultural providers for women and this creates dependency where women expect financial support from the household provider. Some women are financially dependent on men throughout their academic careers and the provider in return expects pure unconditional love and respect. Once the relationship turns sour, it might sometimes lead to violence, or even worse. As the man is supporting the woman on many levels, doesn’t she owe him everything? Doesn’t he have all the rights on her as he’s the provider? If the relationship turns bad, how come it would be the man’s fault? She must be the one to blame, isn’t she? Yes, that’s a common rationale behind the tragedy of passion killings.
Another factor is the practice of living together as love partners at a young age. Young girls and women stay with their boyfriend without parental consent, and so without any parental control over what might be going on with these young couples. Several incidents of passion killings involve young girls and women killed by lovers or husbands. Although men and boys are sometimes victims, passion killing is one type of gender-based violence.
Most of the murders occur when one partner wants to walk out of the relationship. It is also often linked to jealousy. Passion killings can happen to everyone. I lost my cousin that way…Her boyfriend brutally murdered her. It was a very traumatic event for everyone as some witnessed the whole scene. One can say it has been a lifetime psychological trauma which struck my family. It was just at the time the law stiffened because perpetrators knew before that they would only go to jail for a matter of time and would be released, so it made them even more willing to behave shamelessly towards their partners.
Where are we heading to? Are we ever going to meet our 2016 pillar of compassionate, just and caring nation? What is our effort to stop passion killing? How can we stop it? Passion killing isn’t just a Botswana problem, it’s a world-wide phenomenon and let Africa unites to combat this cruelty. This must stop.
